


Hiring Blues

by Setcheti



Series: BobsWorld [2]
Category: Bob the Builder
Genre: Diary/Journal, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-24
Updated: 2016-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-15 22:05:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5801953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Setcheti/pseuds/Setcheti
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Excerpts from the very private journal of Dr. Charles Allen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hiring Blues

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mickeygrl18](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=mickeygrl18).



> A belated Happy Birthday to mickeygrl18, who I thought could probably use something to make her smile.

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 15  
_

  Never realized there were so many assholes in the engineering profession. Or so many engineers who can’t tell a nail from a screw and yet think they’re God’s gift to the construction industry. Considering just driving down to the nearest construction site and asking everyone with a hard hat on if they’d like to work with a talking backhoe. Hey, it worked with Fred.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 19  
_

  Seriously considering cloning Fred, but he can’t tell a nail from a screw either.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 38  
_

  Weeded down the candidates for…whatever the hell we’re going to call this position, I still have no idea. If repair requests from the Valley keep coming in, may have to tell the poor schmuck I hire that he’s going to be everybody’s bitch. Or maybe that’s just Fred’s bitch – seriously, what kind of farmer can’t fix his own squeaky hinges?!? Will have to make sure the new hire is someone who can get along with Fred, they’ll be seeing a lot of each other.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 39  
_

  One candidate overheard me bitching about the squeaky hinges, suggested telling Fred to spray a little nonstick cooking spray on them until someone can take a look. He also suggested warning him not to use the kind that has flour in it. Not sure if he was kidding or not, but passed the warning along anyway.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 45  
_

  Definitely want to hire Bob, the cooking-spray guy. Liked him at his initial interview, just wasn’t sure because we had so many other candidates with more experience, more education…oh hell, they were all arrogant assholes, I wouldn’t have let them near the other human residents of the Valley, much less one of the machines. Don’t think Bob has an arrogant bone in his body. Nice guy, thinks on his feet, interacts with the machines better than anyone else I’ve seen. Threw him in with some of the assholes and he held his own with a smile on his face, somehow he even managed to get half of them to work together. Amazing.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 48  
_

  Just read over Bob’s background check – the real one, not the standard one that got him in the door. He’s almost too good to be true. Almost. There was this little thing on his high school record, didn’t make any sense so I passed it on to Mike. Mike called back after he’d stopped laughing, told me to take another look at Bob’s brother. Oh, right – they’re twins. Looks like someone took the fall to keep his brother out of trouble, didn’t want him to get grounded because of some big trip he’d been planning with his friends. Mike said the principal remembered the whole thing really well, one more glowing recommendation for Bob. Also noticed he’d had what sounded like a breakdown – physical, not mental – about five years back. Checked his medical records, then ran it past Todd. Todd did a little digging of his own, called back and told me a story that made me cringe. Now I’m for sure going to hire him, and now I know why he’s still not married at thirty-two. And Todd is such a mother hen, he’ll keep an eye out for the kid.

  Not that thirty-two is a kid, not really, but he’s a kid compared to the rest of us.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 53  
_

  Hired Bob – not like I could have hired anyone else, at this point. The machines love him. The rest of my staff loves him. Hell, he’s been to the bar over on State Street twice and everyone there already knows his name! Maybe Bob is the one I should clone.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 60  
_

  Decided against cloning Bob – I like being the only one who has one, thanks. The Training Center tried to steal him, and Bess at the bar threatened to spit in my beer if I sent him out to the island. Note to self: Do not go in State Street bar for at least six months once Bob tells them he’s leaving.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 66  
_

  Bad news, Bob’s twin didn’t pass security. He’s up in the Arctic Circle right now, working on the international pipeline project, and his boss is the nosy type. Actually, the guy’s a spy. Told Bob, crossed my fingers and prayed he wouldn’t quit – I mean, we couldn’t clear his parents either, just his Aunt Doris who I personally think is an old bat. Bob was upset about Tom but didn’t quit. Yay me! Think I’ll look into outing the Arctic spy, future Christmas present for Bob.

 

_Journal Entry - S.V. Hiring Cycle No. 9, Day 83 (cycle closed)  
_

  Bob went to the island today. People in Training Center not speaking to me, secretaries not speaking to me – did everyone forget who the boss is here? I’m one of the smartest men alive, I created this Project and the Foundation, leaders of the world heed my advice…

  Receptionist tearfully pointed out that I can’t fix the copy machine when it breaks. Oops. Note to self: Buy flowers for receptionist and chocolate donuts for secretarial pool if ever want to get my messages again. Oh, and hire copy machine repair guy.

 


End file.
